Rule #38

I have a rule book. You may not realize it, but you do too. So what is a rule book? A rule book is a book full of dreams. What are these dreams? They are the rules that everyone would live by if you were King/Queen. Well I've already told you about some of my rules:

1. Pinky Rings aren't allowed.

2. Boys wearing Chacos on campus is banned.

There are so many others, but today I want to tell you about Rule #38 - Old Men aren't allowed to be ornery. They just aren't. I know this is quite a weird rule to have, but I have it. A lot of my teachers in my business major are older men who have already had their professions. Some of my teachers have been the sweetest guys. One of my teachers always wore a bow tie and sweater vest and called himself an "Old Geyser." It was so cute. Then there was my guitar teacher who always wore his cowboy boots and bolo ties and told stories about "Back in the day..."

Unfortunately I have had some ornery old men teachers. They constantly complain about my generation (which I have to be honest, they have some points....), they are bitter, and sometimes they even swear! Apparently I have a bad sense of humor because I don't think it's funny and everyone else thinks it's hilarious. I have this one teacher this semester and I'm going crazy. For one thing he has a pinky ring and he always puts his head on his hands so then I can't even look at him while he teaches. The first day of school he pulled out a cell phone and said, "You want to know how I feel about cell phones?" Then he chucked it against the wall as hard as he could. It fell apart and as he was putting it back together he said he bought that phone just for that demonstration. Nice one ornery old man. Nice one.

I guess it just makes me sad to see old people unhappy and bitter. So what are old men supposed to be like? They're supposed to be happy because of the awesome life they've led. They're supposed to smell like "peppermint and pipe tobacco" (I hope someone gets that quote), be loving towards everyone, find cute ways to fit their testimony into conversations, and make funny little jokes.

An example of the perfect old man would be this guy:

Isn't that Matthew Cuthbert? Appears to be. Anyways, I love Matthew. He is just so sweet. You want to know another example of the perfect old man? My Grandpa Dayton. My Grandpa was the sweetest man. He would just sit there and smile listening to conversations. He would find ways to tease you, but in a nice loving way. I never visited with him without him bearing his testimony about something. He was just awesome.

So come on old men, why can't you all be Matthew Cuthberts or Grandpa Daytons?